Run your own brain with NLP

NLP stands for Neuro-Linguistic Programming, a name that encompasses the three most influential components involved in producing human experience: Neurology, Language and Programming. The neurological system regulates how our bodies function, language determines how we interface and communicate with other people and our programming determines the kinds of models of the world we create. Neuro-Linguistic Programming describes the fundamental dynamics between mind (neuro) and language (linguistic) and how their interplay affects our body and behavior (programming). NLP was originated by John Grinder (whose background was in linguistics) and Richard Bandler (whose background was in mathematics and gestalt therapy) for the purpose of making explicit models of human excellence. Bandler is teaching through some simple experiments how we can learn to run our own brain. The following is from R. Bandler's book "Using Your Brain For A Change".   

Now, take your time, sit back in peace, maybe close your eyes and think of a very pleasant past experience. Make sure you recall all details and you see exactly what you saw back then. Change the brightness of the image and notice how your feelings change accordingly. Make the picture brighter and brighter, bring it closer and closer and now make it dimmer and dimmer, push it away and away and back to brighter!! How do you feel?  

Of course there are some exceptions, but for most of you, your feelings become brighter or dimmer following the picture! How you ever thought of that possibility you have to adjust the pictures of your mind according to the feelings you want to have each time? I guess almost everyone lets their brain randomly show pictures it wishes and you feel good or bad, according to what you are shown and not what you really want. 

 Now, do the same with an unpleasant experience, something it makes you feel bad. And start playing again: make the picture dimmer and dimmer, fuzzier and fuzzier and experience your feelings becoming fuzzier, too! Does that picture bother you still?  

Of course each experience had its own special characteristics, so you have to “play” in relation. For example a candle-light dinner will fade away if you picture it too bright and an unpleasant experience will be stronger if you bring it too close to you. For those who want to run their brain, they can try changing each quality and elements of the below list, so they find out what are the ones affecting the experiences and how much. Preferably choose a pleasant experience and let the game begin! 

1)      Color. Intense bright colors to black and white will affect your feelings accordingly. Choose what you want!
 

2)      Distance. Very close to far away.

3)      Depth. Flat pictures become two or three dimensional.

4)      Duration. Vary from a quick picture to a persistent one!

5)      Clarity. Crystal-clear pictures to fuzzy and blur.

6)      Contrast. Adjust the difference between light and dark.

7)      Scope. A picture in a frame can become a panoramic one, which continues even if you turn your head around.

8)      Movement. Make a movie or feel good with a still photo.

9)      Speed. Very slow to very fast pictures affects feelings very fast or very slow!

10)  Hue. Play with the color balance, with the reds, blues and greens.

11)  Transparency. A transparent picture allows you to see what lies beneath the surface.

12)  Aspect Ratio. Take a framed pic and make it tall and narrow or short and wide.

13)  Orientation. Tilt the top of that picture away from you and then toward you and then away again.

14)  Foreground/Background. Make the difference between what interests you (foreground) and the context it happens to be there (background) and reverse them.

 

The list with the qualities goes on and relates to your personality. You can always use volume, rhythm, location, number, temperature, shape, odor, taste and smell are quite useful and strong qualities.
 
It’s time to make the brain our servant and with a little exercise we can all manage to. Notice the children while drawing; they do not care about the reality – they simply represent the reality of their brain, the reality they wish and we, adults, always find it so clever and cute! Isn’t time to do the same for our own sake?



 

25 secrets to a better life!

The only secret to a better life is a life that’s lived to the fullest.

Each of us has our own way of life; the reality is that even how different we are and the way we live, there is still one universal truth, values and principles that is rule our world. These truths are both simple and general that if you try to learn and apply them in your life, a great change can happen. 

That truth gives other people a chance to find their place in this world and to live their life to its fullness. The question now is, how can achieve a better life and live life to the fullest? If you are really interested in creating positive changes in your life, start learning and applying the principles of living a better life.  

1) Live today.

Past can’t be brought back and the future will always be uncertain. Today is yours, so make the most of it.

 

2) Keep balance. 

We are affected by the four aspects that are mental (brain), emotional (heart), spiritual (faith) and physical (body). Learning to keep balance among the four aspects, makes us a balanced person!

 

3) Forgive and Forget. 

The only person that suffers when you do not forgive is you and only you. The other person is probably caring less of what you feel. Do a favor to yourself to yourself and forget about it.   

4) Accept change as part of life. 

The more you can adapt to change, the easier your life is because change can open bigger and better possibilities for you, if only you’d accept it.  

5) Visit places you never been before. 

Seeing a new place let you discover and learn more of other things and people in your life. It helps you expand your perspective and horizon.  

6) Read books. 

The best way to ameliorate yourself and your life is through continuously learning. Try to challenge yourself with new thoughts and new perceprions of things. That will keep you expanding and growing.  

7) Attend classes.

Just like the swimming lessons you’ve always wanted to take back in high school. Remember that you’d never be too old to learn and discover your skills and qualities.  

8) Take time to make memories and keep journals. 

We should not wait for memories to happen, we should make memories happen. Find time to create memories with others. Note each moment you do not want to forget, either good and bad. Read your journal once in a while to feel that warmth inside your heart!

 

9) Capture the moments. 

The ability to retrieve a memory boosts by photographs and videos. Start taking those pictures you’d love to look back in your old days.  

10) Smile. 

Nothing beats a cheerful heart and mind. Be happy regardless. Make the world a better place to live in. Start sharing your sweet smile with yourself first every morning and then with all the others around you!  

11) Join a club. 

To learn more about yourself is by being more exposed in to new people and learning from them. It will help build yours and the others self-awareness; we evolve at the rate of the community we are plugged into.  

12) Learn to give. 

“The more you give, the more you receive”. Our value as human being depicts on what we can give and not on our capacity of receiving.  

13) Spend time with the young ones. 

There’s no better stress reliever than the positive and careless feeling given by a young one!   

14) Open your ears to the elders. 

Reaaly listening to the old ones makes you wiser. Remember, the best way to learn and avoid failure is through the experiences of others.  

15) Accept and manage failure. 

Do not be afraid to make mistake. Most successful people have gone through multiple failures. So mush wisdom is hidden on every failure!   

16) Take risk. 

Life is full of chances and you should take chances. As they say, the higher the risk the higher the success!

17) Cry.
Girls or boys, women or men, every one cries. You need to cry, it eases the burden plus it will keep you from having diseases that’s caused by emotional suffering.  

18) Respect other’s opinion. 

Who wins in an argument? Keep yourself away from arguments. Learn to listen to what others may say without necessary believing and taking them as true for yourself.  

19) Take a break. 

Reward yourself for a days’ work. Take that break, treat yourself to a drink, a sweet, a hot bath, a good film or just a few-minutes nap!  

20) Work smart, not hard. 

The most stressed people are those who do not work smart. Do not take the entire task to yourself. You are not alone in this world. Learn to trust the others - it’s not a weakness to ask for help!

 

21) Be yourself. 

Don’t try to act like someone else just to please everyone; you just can't. Stay true to who you are. Eventually, you’d discover who are worth keeping in your life from those who are not.  

22) Start caring. 

People don’t care how much you know, they want to know how much you care. Let the people know that you care. Remember, that relationship is more lasting than any of accomplishments and prestige.

23) Meditate.

Take a time to be with yourself and be silent. Such can relax you and helps you discover more of your qualities and potentials. You can go anywhere you want, you can do anything you want!  

24) Discover your purpose in life. 

Life is a journey. As you go along your journey, prepare your route. Discover the real you at the right place and time. To help you discover, ask yourself, “If there was no praise or criticism in the world, then who would I like to be?” Once you know the answer, you are right there.  

25) Take responsibility of your actions. 

Do not live for yourself alone; remember that there are other people and creatures surrounding you.  Always bare in mind that every move and action you take creates an effect to others. Start contributing your knowledge and experience for the benefit of the whole world. 

 

Life is not easy nor that tough neither. Having a good life and living our life to its fullness is a personal  choice. So make that choice! All the above have not covered all the ways. You too have your own share on how to live life to its fullest. Just start living your life the way you want!

 

 

 

 

Heart-warming words!

There are a few, so small sentences, that makes you feel like hugging the person who uttered them, makes your heart feel the warmth and the love of each word. Small phrases that give you motivation, inspiration, strength to go on, affirmation, respect, support. They will ring a bell to the parents of this blog, as I believe they say these words to their kids all the time!

Now it's time to think twice and use them in our everyday life, with the people we love and cherish the most. Believe me, the moment these phrases go out of your mouth, you will be the first one to feel all the above; sit back and watch your life getting better and your relationships reach their zenith!!

1) "I love you. And nothing will change that, no matter what you do."
Yes, you won't use it with every person in your life, only with your special ones. Make sure these special ones are not just your spouse or your kids. Use it with your friends, your parents if you still have them around, with your colleagues, with your students! Feel each and every word you say by looking in the eye and be the first one to feel the waves of warmth embrace you! Feel the love we learnt to forget somewhere out there and bring back bliss in your life!!

2) "You are amazing! There is no one like you. No one!"
Because this is simply the truth! Every one is unique, each and every one of us is one and only! Just imagine how you feel when you manage to accomplish something you work on for a long time, or when you reach your goals! How does that feel? Say these words to your mirror and take notice of your eyes! Use them with your children, your parents, your hubbie! If this isn't the support and motivation we are talking about, then what?

3) " It's all right to cry. People cry for a number of reasons: because they are hurt, sad, glad, or worried; when they are angry, afraid, or lonely. Big people cry too. I do."
Crying is the remedy for many situations. It reliefs you, takes away the tension, expresses your inner and more sensitive self, it makes you seem as human as everyone, it connects you with your long-forgoten child inside you. Feel free to cry, encourage others to cry on your shoulder and then together hold your heads up again, stonger than life!

4) "You've made a mistake - it's OK. People make mistakes. I do. Is it something we can fix?"
So many mistakes and so many lessons to be learnt... But this is only human! It's alright to make a mistake, its alright to make an unsuccessful decision. It takes guts to admit them, it takes guts to notice them, it takes guts to start all over again. A mistake, when not fatal, is a second chance, it's another opportunity you have to fix it and learn from it. No one should feel guilty about it - on the contrary, feel proud of yourself and do your best to amend things!

5) "You did the right thing! Though not easy, you did it. I am proud of you; you should be too!"
Countless the times when we had to make a decision and still in doubt if we did the right thing. We all need a friend to reassure us, to tell us we are right. Be the one for yourself, be the one for your friends and beloved. Deciding is always a challenge: small for some, big for others - it doesn't matter. What really matters is the "you did the right thing" you tell yourself/family/friends. This is the meaning of support!

6) "I am sorry. I didn't mean it."
Hardest words ever! You have to forget about your selfishness, your unreasonable pride, admit your mistakes and show the beauty of your heart! Sounds easy? Have a go! If you find it difficult to try it with your closests, try it with strangers: say "I'm sorry" when you accidentaly push someone in the super market or in the queue at the cinema. See their tiny smile and then go for bigger smiles inside your house. Most of all, you feel better first - and this is the goal here. If you feel good, everyone around you feels better!

7)"What a great idea! How did you come up with it? Tell me more!"
Be honest with yourself and tell me how many times you were really there when your spouse explains you a new idea of theirs? How many time you were really listening to a friend and not thinking about a similar situation of yours? Try to be a listening ear, show your deep interest and make the speaker in front of you feel important! If they are important for you once, you will be important for them twice!! Have in mind: respect and interest!

8) "When you need a friend, I'll be there for you."
Such a comforting sentence! So heart-warmimg! And don't take it for granted: not many have real friends ready to spend their entire night listening to that sobbing and crying. Not many have people around them to truly care about their feelings. If you are one of the not many, then you are so blessed! Feel the blessing inside you and if you remember one or two occasions when you were not exactly the real friend, be the one! Remember: what goes around, comes around!

9) "I missed you! I think about you when we are not together!"
OMG! Just imagine you hear these words often from beloved lips! How do you feel? Isn't that touches your most sensitive part of your soul? Someone missed you and thinks about you! You mean so much to them! Give that same pleasure to your surroundings! Tell your spouse you missed them after their 9-5 daily work! Tell your parents you missed them and you call them just because! Tell your brother/sister/niece/nephew you missed them and you wanted to make sure they are ok. Be ready for their response, 'cause you're about to have an emotional one - I bet!

10)"Please / Thank you."
Needless to say anything here. If you should choose only 2 words, go for them and only them. They contain all the affection, love, bliss, forgiveness, respect, motivation, appreciation you could posible give and take. Wanna try?

Ten sentences, ten phrases that we should all use in our daily life and yet I'm not sure we do!! Since it's time to re-connect with our inner self, with our spirituality and positiveness, shall we try? The outcomes could only be healing for us first and for the rest of the world in due time!!